Sunday, October 31, 2010


I have been experimenting with ketosis which is a stage your body enters during starvation, around 3 days of fasting. I recommend that any girl who is the fasting type research this term. Its very useful.

On that note, I was able to fast for 38 hours before I cheated. I had some cheesy chips & cereal. Believe me, I had to endure the guilt all night. it hasn't even been 24 hours since then so I'm still slightly plagued. My goal is 96 hours which is around 4 days. After the 72nd hour, I will be burning straight fat for 24 hours!! I believe I'll have a salad to break the fast otherwise I may go to the show which serves food as well. Also, I find it necessary to do this again the 20th of November approximately 5 days before Thanksgiving & Black Friday & I know I will be eating. Stay strong ladies! I hope I can be a thinspiration to you all!!

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Windy in the City

today, i have had one bottle of Diet Pepsi(0) a cup of joe(60) and one graham cracker(150) so 210 calories for the day. Its not that bad I suppose. I actually wanted to fast for 5 days in a row so that I can enter into ketosis buttt my sister has a ham meal planned tomorrow. That is why i am so sad about todays intake. Im keeping a reserve for tomorrow. the good news is that tomorrow i will practice moderation--chewing slowly, eating only a little, guzzling water, or diet soda, and allowing my body to register that it is full before i consume too many calories. with thanksgiving right around the corner, i really need to fast quite often so that i don't fall behind when the day comes. i have a reserve for that day and Black Friday. Thursday I have school all day= fasting. friday i have work=fasting saturday i work= fasting and sunday i am doing a double so most definitely=fasting. that is four days of not eating. on monday, i will eat a salad.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

October 21 2010-----approx. 102 pounds

i know... :(

Because skinny jeans weren't meant for fat people--

had an apple for breakfast. for lunch i will drink a bottle of diet pepsi. Dinner... a cup of cofee (60)it is embarrasing when my boyfriend touches me. still going with the hope that we have a house to live in together by November 5th. translation: i have 3 weeks to shed a minimum of 4 pounds. i am continuing my restriction until i get home from work tomorrow, around midnight. if i am feeling weak, then maybe i will order a salad and eat it before work. Nothing besides excessive restricting can cut me down to size. It is sad that 98lbs has now become a milestone/goal for me when it used to be the norm. :( But i know my own strength and i know that i can do this.

I have watched a couple of videos on youtube for thinspo support. they were breathtaking and i only regret that i can't copy and paste the photos. i need more places to search for thinspo besides google and photobucket. i don't kno where to begin or what terms to use.
Nevertheless, i will remain strong, take those vitamins and race for my milestone.


Thursday, October 14, 2010


Have i mentioned how big my thighs are? if i don't do something soon I am going to have a figure... wait, i am doing something. but its at this time in the journey that i get impatient. It takes time to lose weight. I know this in theory. it doesn't keep me from hoping that one day i still might just wake up skinny as hell. i still cannot breathe properly so a run is out of the question. i swore that i would use the 3 1/2 hour break I have later to do homework but maybe I will just go for a walk in my forest... then i wont want to return to school so maybe i will just walk around campus. regardless, the weight needs to be lost. Yesterday I had an english muffin, a bowl of bland homemade chicken noodle soop, and a bowl of ice cream. I could have nixed the ice cream i suppose..... today, i ate a mini bagel(100). I have already decided that i have reached my intake for today. skinny skinny skinny.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Staying strong

The last traces of a cough still linger in my body. I am getting edgy and excited to renew my endeavours. I can see clearly the weight I've gained. It is embarrassing. I can already feel the pleasure or watching my thighs, my stomach my arms just disappear. I forgot about the THRILL! Tomorrow I begin cutting down. I do not want to reinstate my cough. Perhaps by Friday I can do a fast.
96 pounds here I come

Saturday, October 9, 2010


I have had a bad cough for the last few days. Of course I would get sick as soon as I decided to renew my efforts to be thin. I feel ashamed of myself. I belbelieve I have reached 102 pounds. That is a record for me since the last 5 years.
I have not been idle but have been printing pages of thinspo and gluing them to my journal. I am very motivated to begin & can't wait until this cold leaves.
Every 3 months I visit the clinic for my birth control & they always weigh me. My goal is to be 96 pounds for my next visit. That should be sometime in December I believe. It seems such a high number for a long goal but im assuming I will lose 2 pounds a month at least. Anything below 96 is still welcome.

Stay strong ladies!